19:1 RULE

For your immediate consideration, may I suggest a little tool? Before you criticize yourself or another, please apply my 19:1 rule. If you look hard-enough for fault, you will surely find it in each and every 1. And “as you sow, so too shall you reap,” when all has been said and done. But if 19 times prior, appropriate acknowledgement is both posit...
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“Kup Choy’s Caveat”

During college one of my part-time jobs was unloading bags of mail from the airplanes at the O’Hare Airport postal service. At the time I was very young, very strong and very dumb but I really didn’t know how dumb I was. Whenever a caravan of mail pulled up to the unloading docks, I was the first one to arrive and the last one to finish. The task r...
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The Dandelion and the Rose

As a young child, I was extremely curious about why so many of the adults around me considered dandelions to be a weed, especially, when dandelions seemed pretty-enough, in my opinion, to simply be a flower of a different kind. Another intriguing observation for me was that many of my neighbors appeared to become frantically obsessed with pulling w...
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Foot-In-The-Garbage-Can

Have you ever found yourself deep into something besmirching which was really messy, icky or dirty in your life? If so, consider my counseling and mentoring visual metaphor of a foot-in-the-garbage can. In fact, I challenge you to actually do it right now! Find a garbage can to accommodate your foot and stick it as far down and as deep into the con...
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Late, Later, Latest… Too Late

Wait, wait, wait. Wait until it’s late. Soon it will be late. Now it is late. Late, late, late... LATE! Soon it will be later. Now it is later. Later, later, later… LATER! Soon it will be latest. Now it is latest. Latest, latest, latest… LATEST! Soon it will be too late. Now it is too late. Too late, too late, too late… TOO LATE! No need to wait. I...
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The Thinker

In quiet moments when I am in deep contemplative thought, pretending I have introduced myself to a new imaginary playmate, I increasingly find myself conjuring a brief conversation with Rodin’s sculpture, The Thinker. While I certainly appreciate that the artist may have been motivated by forces, either demonic or divine, and intended an entirely d...
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Reaction vs. Response

Do you know the difference between a reaction and a response? Consider a marionette which is a puppet manipulated by the puppet master or marionetteer. When the strings are pulled, the marionette reacts in a passive and dependent manner. It has no choice but to do the bidding of its puppet master because it is only just a puppet. Whenever any strin...
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Simple!

Female Limbic System
It is a simple error of logic to think that with the passage of time and the scientific assertion of evolution as a positive consequence of “natural selection,” that modern day human beings are so complexly different from our prehistoric ancestors. Comparison of our respective limbic systems would likely reveal not all that much substantive differe...
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Catching a Chimp

I once heard a story; About a very clever method; For catching a chimp. To be sure, I confess; I am truly uncertain; As to the true veracity of the tale; Yet, whether true or false; The implications are; Quite utterly profound! Start with an elongated; Heavy metal or ceramic urn; New or used will do; Do not monkey around! Put a tasty banana; Or olf...
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"RAWDEAL"

As a psychologist, if I have heard it once from my clients, I have probably heard it at least a thousand times, about the “raw deal” that many believed was unfairly visited upon them by an external agent for which they were injured or harmed with little recourse but to obsequiously accede and then to “bend over and take it!” After much thought, it ...
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Two-To-The-Third

Every good carpenter knows the ’old saw’ to “measure twice, cut once.” The idea is to check and re-check the correct measurement because once you cut you cannot re-cut. If you cut according to specifications, you are usually “good-to-go.” If you do not cut according to specifications you are usually “in trouble!” Some measures in life are complicat...
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What Are You Worth?

Many people I have encountered over the years erroneously believe they are “worth” what they want to be “worth,” what they hope to be “worth,” or even what they idealize themselves to be “worth.” Those who are extremely concrete and literal, incorrectly, assess what they are “worth” by the “bottom line” of their financial portfolio or the kinds of ...
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