Responsibility

What is the root word in responsible? Might it be “response?” We know from various noted references that the construct of responsibility conveys a sense of moral obligation or accountability, usually, to another (or to oneself). However, what specific response is needed, wanted or required in order for a responsible reckoning to result? It seems pr...
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Foot-In-The-Garbage-Can

Have you ever found yourself deep into something besmirching which was really messy, icky or dirty in your life? If so, consider my counseling and mentoring visual metaphor of a foot-in-the-garbage can. In fact, I challenge you to actually do it right now! Find a garbage can to accommodate your foot and stick it as far down and as deep into the con...
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I Might Just Piss You Off!

Not that I wish to offend, but sometimes I must. The truth hurts and so, too, does a lie. “Mirror, mirror on the wall...” am I the fairest one of all? Of course you are! After all, who wouldn’t see just how very special you are? Except for the fact that you are not always right. Or good. Or kind. Or considerate. Or respectful. In fact, sometimes, y...
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“2nd Hardest Thing”

“The 2nd hardest thing that any one of us will ever have to do in our lives is to get up out of bed each morning!” When you get up out of bed, you have made an affirmative choice to pursue a pathway to engage in self-agency as your own prime agent. The first pathway is to be passive and dependent with you watching and waiting to see what will happe...
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Late, Later, Latest… Too Late

Wait, wait, wait. Wait until it’s late. Soon it will be late. Now it is late. Late, late, late... LATE! Soon it will be later. Now it is later. Later, later, later… LATER! Soon it will be latest. Now it is latest. Latest, latest, latest… LATEST! Soon it will be too late. Now it is too late. Too late, too late, too late… TOO LATE! No need to wait. I...
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Winners and Losers

The problem with “winners” is that the “losers” almost invariably seek revenge and retaliation.   And when the “losers” eventually become the “winners,” the process recapitulates itself, ad infinitum. Human beings seem to innately discern, very quickly, what is deemed to be “fair” or “not fair.”   When someone believes they have been trea...
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How to Be a Good “Crazy” Person!

Many years ago I stumbled upon the ‘secret formula’ of how to be a good “crazy” person: Simply live your life in such a way that you “know you know and know you mustn’t...” Then whatever follows can only remain a compensatory adaptation to living your life a lie! The ‘antidote’ is equally straightforward: When you “know you know, and know, and act ...
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Your Choice

It is easy to succeed at failing. Almost anyone can achieve this simple goal. Simply start by knowing right from wrong. Then choose wrong. By choosing wrong you can’t go right. (Except that three left turns make a right). Because when you choose not right... You have made your choice. All that remains is for you to act upon it. It is easy to succee...
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Reaction vs. Response

Do you know the difference between a reaction and a response? Consider a marionette which is a puppet manipulated by the puppet master or marionetteer. When the strings are pulled, the marionette reacts in a passive and dependent manner. It has no choice but to do the bidding of its puppet master because it is only just a puppet. Whenever any strin...
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Living with Regret

Regret is that state of being, which occurs either momentarily and/or for all eternity, in which the person living with regret, has chosen, of their own free will, to act or to behave in a manner, which results in a harm to self and/or to another. In other words, regret is generally an avoidable consequence when infractible behavior fails to occur....
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"Feelings Aren't Right"

“Feelings aren’t right.” They simply exist to orient us to what we need, want or require. Affective experience is an ontogenetic precursor to cognition. Developmentally, feelings occur long before our thinking with language is possible. As such, feelings are pre-verbal and pre-logical. Again, they simply exist to orient us to what we need, want or ...
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Robbed at Gunpoint

Robbed at gunpoint by only three men. Three against one seemed like overkill then. Money they wanted and demanded it now. If I refused, they promised to shoot me...pow! I said, if you please, a moment will I need. Assessing if I ought to acquiesce or bleed. Surprised were their faces when asked I for time. We got the gun, sucker; can drop you on a ...
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“3+/-E’s”

In my opinion, there are three positive (+) or good “E’s” and three negative (-) or bad “E’s”. The first good “E” is to be “Effective.” To do what you set out to do. To finish what you started. To do it correctly, preferably the first time. To achieve the desired result. If you are not effective, then you are ineffective. To not do what you set out...
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"Assertiveness Formula"

Have we got a terrific deal for all you boys and girls today! Only one to a customer but, shhh, you have our unrestricted permission to faithfully use our special “assertiveness formula” as often as you want! You will absolutely, positively improve your communication and conflict resolution competencies with each use, guaranteed, or your money back...
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Simple!

Female Limbic System
It is a simple error of logic to think that with the passage of time and the scientific assertion of evolution as a positive consequence of “natural selection,” that modern day human beings are so complexly different from our prehistoric ancestors. Comparison of our respective limbic systems would likely reveal not all that much substantive differe...
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Love Lessons

b2ap3_thumbnail_love_lessons.jpg
All of the circumstances, events and happenings associated with the gradual awakening that we are born, live and die, invite deep thought as to which developmental tasks are required of every individual to successfully navigate and integrate each of these rewarding and perilous passages. The first crucible that birth confronts us with is the Hercul...
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Catching a Chimp

I once heard a story; About a very clever method; For catching a chimp. To be sure, I confess; I am truly uncertain; As to the true veracity of the tale; Yet, whether true or false; The implications are; Quite utterly profound! Start with an elongated; Heavy metal or ceramic urn; New or used will do; Do not monkey around! Put a tasty banana; Or olf...
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The Three Legged Stool of Character

“Character” is a “three-legged stool.” It is who you are when everything is going your way. It is who you are when nothing is going your way. It is who you are when no one is looking. The three legs do not have to be even. But the “stool” must be able to stand on its own. One leg may be longer or shorter or larger or smaller. But the “stool” must b...
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The Fulcrum of Truth

Inverted Fulcrum
  Imagine a teeter-totter on a playground. The balance-point or center is called the fulcrum. Now think of the word: T-R-U-T-H equally positioned on the teeter-totter. Where is the fulcrum? It’s U! Now think of the word: T-R-U-S-T equally positioned on the teeter-totter. Where is the fulcrum? Again, it’s U! Take a breath. Hold it. Exhale. Thin...
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5 Answers to Every Question

In my opinion, there are at least 5 answers to every question! 1. A 2. B 3. Both A and B 4. Neither A and B 5. Or something else we’re not smart-enough to know right now. The typical reply to a question is usually positional or A. The typical counter reply is usually oppositional, i.e., not A, or B. A: “The sky is blue.” B: “The sky is not blue.” A...
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