From Dr. Larry

Dr. Larry Gelman is fiercely devoted to each client, with a deep and profound respect for their own self-agency and self-determination.

"RAWDEAL"

As a psychologist, if I have heard it once from my clients, I have probably heard it at least a thousand times, about the “raw deal” that many believed was unfairly visited upon them by an external agent for which they were injured or harmed with little recourse but to obsequiously accede and then to “bend over and take it!”

After much thought, it eventually occurred to me that the “raw deal” lingo was really a conscious manifestation of an unconscious constellation of powerful ’affects,’ whereby, if the “raw deal” verbalization was viewed as an, heuristic, acronym, then by taking the first letter of each of the words which follow below...

Rage

Associated

With

Despair

Escalates

At

Length

...the acronym created or derived would be result in “RAWDEAL!”

Consider the implications, on a personal level, if you are raging and despairing with respect to something, anything that is upsetting or hurting you beyond your control and consider, further, that these affective experiencings continue unabated for an indefinite period of time.

It has long been my deeply-held contention as a mental health professional, after treating thousands of clients, that human beings can almost-always “deal” with virtually anything if they know what the heck they are “dealing” with and that their not knowing “what’s the deal” or “are we there yet” is what makes for extremely “unhappy campers.” 

When rage “bubbles over” and the only relief is to suffer and endure until “the bitter end” or if “there’s nothing left,” then it really doesn’t take a rocket scientist or a clinical psychologist to figure-out that “something is rotten in Denmark!”

Remember the old whistling tea kettles which screamed to the user its readiness for action when the water was at the maximum“boiling point” and, if not attended to appropriately and in due time, the water in the pot—despite the continual release of pressurized steam—would, analogically, experience “rage associated with despair (which) escalates at length” and you’d wind-up with a very scorched tea pot with “nothing left in the tank.”

If your engine continues to “redline in neutral,” you run the irreparable risk that your “engine will seize.” And if all of your fuel is “spent,” then you will ingloriously find yourself bereft of the requisite “energy” to harness and to make work for you to “run the  machinery” of the larger system.

There is a serendipitous “silver lining” to the “RAWDEAL” construct insofar as the emergent awareness within you of rage, along with incremental intimations of despair, can actually orient you to constructively and productively choose to utilize the “RAWDEAL” energy and turn it into “raw horsepower,” “person power,” or “you power!”

When you empower yourself to use your power, from what once was a “RAWDEAL” feeling or experience of complete disempowerment, you will soon discover that you can become remarkably powerful. And to my simple way of thinking, that’s a pretty darn “good deal.”

Author Note: Dr. Larry B. Gelman is a Clinical Psychologist and a Personal Mentor


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